If The Book of Mormon gets its own musical, then so does LadyMo. It’s only fair.
As much as I loooovvee Glee, I cringe at admitting that it had any significant role in my conversion story. But alas, it seems it deserves its own post. Please reserve judgement for exactly right …. now.
Here’s what happened. After the DCC kitchen incident, or so I would have called it that day, I was driving back home and rocking out to Glee in order to clear my head. I was stressed and hurting and spinning and just needed some happy fun tunes to clear my head and heart.
And then this came on:
I had to pull over on the side of the highway because every gallon of emotion that I had been hiding behind very rigid teary eyes and crossed arms and legs came flooding out at that moment. I was sobbing so hard and so violently I was so way not safe enough to drive. I sat on the shoulder for enough time to let it all out and then pull myself together. Yes, I had that reaction to Total Eclipse of the Heart. But not just any TEofH, but the Glee version. Le sigh.
But I’m going to try to redeem myself. Imagine, if you will, the lady part as parts of the conversation I would be having if I were throwing a fit with my Heavenly Father:
Every now and then I get a little bit lonely and you’re never coming around.
Every now and then I get a little bit helpless and I’m lying like a child in your arms.
Every now and then I get a little bit angry and I know I’ve got to get out and cry.
And I need you now tonight. And I need you more than ever. And if you’ll only hold me tight, we’ll be holding on forever.
Your love is like a shadow on me all of the time. I don’t know what to do and I’m always in the dark. We’re living in a powder keg and giving off sparks.
I really need you tonight.
Here you have it. These are the words I was sobbing in song, in prayer, to our Heavenly Father just a few moments after desperately protesting the missionaries’ efforts to find out if I even believed in God.
Imagine, again, if you will, the dude parts of this song. This is what I imagine He was saying back to me in my roadside temper tantrum:
Turn around, bright eyes.
We’ll be holding on forever.
Forever is gonna start tonight.
Yes, I’m a dork. It was just as embarrassing at the time as it is reflecting upon it now. That being said, it was what I needed to say to our Heavenly Father. Or sing. Or scream off key through sobbing snot filled tears. Much like this, actually:
My Glee-Mormon mashup doesn’t end here. Also on my playlist was this song, and listening to it always brings up the feelings of when I was reading the Book of Mormon in complete frustration:
I listened to this song a lot last Fall when I was “going through” all of this. It just felt so Mormon to me, whatever that means. Listening to this song, it felt like this was what MoBoy was trying to get through to me. On the outside, I was hard as a rock and was fighting so hard to not let things in. On the inside, I was dying to feel like this:
Happy days are here again/ The skies above are clear again/ So let’s sing a song of cheer again
Happy days are here again/ Altogether shout it now/ There’s no one who can doubt it now
So let’s tell the world about it now/ Happy days are here again
When I was listening to this song last year, I felt like I was losing this battle of wills. I felt like I was about to be proven wrong. I felt like I could almost smell the baptismal font.
And thus ends LadyMo: The Musical.
So much geeky love,
The Lady Mo